Posts Tagged ‘David Stern’

An open letter to all involved in the NBA negotiations

September 20, 2011

There was finally some good news from the NBA’s bargaining table…that was quickly followed with some bad news, but let’s try to be positive. According to the story, Cavs owner Dan Gilbert and Phoenix owner Robert Sarver “expressed dissatisfaction with many of the points,” that the owners were discussing amongst themselves, after meeting with the players earlier in the day. Apparently things were going pretty well—closer than ever. According to this SB Nation story, the owners were willing to reach a compromise on a new collective bargaining deal this week.” But then Gilbert and Sarver ruined. The story also says that the Knicks’ James Dolan and Lakers’ Jerry Buss “were visibly annoyed by the demands of Gilbert and Sarver. You know, the powerful owners were mad the underlings were messing stuff up. And I can’t blame them. Later David Stern would say that the owners had “virtual unanimity.” Who knows what is really going on, but it seems as those things are getting closer, and that means an NBA season.

And that season, at this point which could still be a full season, means I will have a full season to watch rather than what I was planning to do—which was get a lot more sleep and watch more college basketball players make horrible late game decisions.

But for the first time during this negotiation it seems as though the NBA is getting closer. I haven’t been this happy since those Scarlet Johanssen pictures I found on the internet recently. And that last time I was truly happy before that was when Brian Cardinal was doing work in the NBA finals.

Now some thoughts on those owners who are trying to ruin my NBA fun—Dan Gilbert doesn’t seem to know when to shut his mouth. He said he’d win a title before Miami, and that was crazier than a weekend in Vegas with Charlie Sheen.

Russ Bengston tweeted “Welp, sabotaging a new CBA is one way for Dan Gilbert to make sure LeBron doesn’t win a title.” And that’s true. Maybe Gilbert is sneakier than we all thought. He can’t put together a team around the best player in the league, but he can derail the progress in a negotiation.

And Sarver had one of the best point guards in the game, the best passer and (undeservingly or not) a back-to-back MVP and couldn’t get by the Spurs for years. Now that his window has passed he doesn’t have to care about playing a season (side note: Steve Nash deserves to go to a contender and have a chance to win a ring. I hate to say it, but he would be amazing to watch on the Heat. He would average about 25 assists).

I’m sure both sides are trying to get everything they can, and that makes sense—it’s smart negotiating. But for just two owners to complain, and not even two of the better owners, is pretty upsetting. I just want the NBA!

I need Boozer screaming about rebounds and and-ones, even when the shots never seem to drop for the and-one. I need to see that little rat controlling Omer Asik’s every move, and making him great at defense. I need to see LeBron quit and Greg Oden go down for the year. I want to see Joakim Noah’s flowing hair and Manu Ginobili’s lack of hair. And also Phil Jackson’s chair

Phil is lucky enough to get a high chair.

(I know he is retiring I just can’t pass up an opportunity to rhyme. Maybe I should have gone with Kevin Garnett’s stare or Eddie House’s absurd flair?). I want Kobe to get mad at teammates and Russell Westbrook to freeze out the best scorer in the league by not passing him the ball. I want Baron Davis’ beard and beer belly. The list goes on and on, and I’m willing to do anything for this season to happen.

I have $14 in my wallet. You can split it $7 each way (players/owners). I also have one of the fake credit cards that are sent to you in the mail. Even though it makes me feel worth something, and like a high-roller, I would be willing to part with that as well if it got the season going. We just have to decide who gets the “Your Name Here” side.

But seriously the fans need basketball. I can’t watch hockey. I don’t even know where the puck is half the time. I even thought about learning the rules to cricket or rugby, so that I would have something to watch. Please help me. College basketball doesn’t cut it. You would think it would, being that the hoops are ten feet and all the players are getting paid, but it just isn’t the same. I need the NBA. And so do so many others.

Don’t make me go outside and be active. I can watch other people be active, and that’s what I want to do.

I even watched the WNBA the other day. I’ll repeat that. I watched the WNBA. And to be honest, I slightly enjoyed it. Look what you’ve done to me, lockout…Are you happy?

Soccer doesn’t do it for me. If I wanted to watch flopping I would just watch Manu Ginobili play. Or this video on replay forever until the NBA comes back.

The NFL got their stuff together, you can do it too. I would give up the entire NFL season to have the NBA, partly because my favorite player is already out for the season and my favorite team stunk up the joint  this past weekend…but also partly because I really love pro basketball.

You’re going to lose a lot more than just a season. You’re going to lose fans, the great momentum from an amazing season and even better postseason.Also respect, but that may not matter to you guys—especially on the players side because they can’t have any respect for themselves as they are dating the women from Basketball Wives.

My sources say the lockout could last for a long time–maybe the whole season. And when I say my sources I mean the voices in my head, but they usually don’t steer me wrong.

Fans are forgiving but they aren’t going to just forget. They’ll be back to watch and buy jerseys and show up for games, but they will remember you turned your back. We fans don’t deserve an apology, but don’t forget it’s not just two sides being affected by this. If you get this all figured out before it makes the league miss any time, we won’t need an apology for anything, except some sleepless night. And to make the season happen on time, I’m willing to use my closet as a dungeon for Mr. Gilbert and Mr. Sager. See, everyone has to sacrifice for this to work.

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